Messy Life, YUP!
There was about a two year period of my life where I regularly prayed to have my priorities shown to me. "Let me know what really matters." I meant it. If I said family was important to me, I wanted to see it in my actions. If I said love was what mattered most, I wanted to feel it. If a human's life wasn't a mistake, I wanted to know them so I could feel connected to who they really were, not the facade. My answers came in pretty messy ways. One of the most beautiful ways has been in developing my empathy and intuition so that I can see and feel who people are even without their mouths telling me. Is what I see and feel there always pretty? Hell no. It's messy. It's sad. It's hard. It's complicated. It's hurt. It's damaged. It's greedy. The lack of self-worth that drives people's behaviors is overwhelming often. But by learning others I learn myself. And by learning myself, I love more of me. And when I start to love more of me, I can love more of you. Because it's all the same thing. We are each other.
We all walk around telling stories about who we are and what we should be. And holy cow guys, it's making you exhausted. All the shoulding on yourselves is constantly sending negative vibrational frequencies in to your systems, and it's weakening you. In a weakened state your chances of changing anything are limited. You might as well strengthen your system by loving yourself through all the shoulds. Your soul is eternal. There's no way this, right now, is the pivotal point of your existence.
Every single person has a story about what they know themselves to be in the secrecy of their hearts, and a contradicting story about who they are supposed to be for real. I see you guys. You aren't alone, because it's every single one of us. We just come in different meat forms. A guy that feels like a girl, a girl that feels like a guy, a mom that can't stop her anger, a husband that doesn't feel connected or kind, a man that wants to love a woman, but loves a man, a teen mom, a porn addicted girl, someone who placed a child for adoption, someone who rapes their wife, someone who can't stop drinking or doing drugs, someone who lost their child to the courts, someone who can't shake their depression or anxiety...
"There's something wrong with the village" and it's not you. It's everyone. Anything that's not inline with love isn't strength. It weakens us all. Visualize yourself behind that person's eyes that you judge as wrong. Be them. They are seeking the same thing you are. They want connection, acceptance and love. They are not a mistake. How could they be? They're here.
My prayers of showing me what really matters most have been building. Each one of you, matters most. And with that being the answer, what else could there be? Right now is all we have. Be you. You've got no other options.